Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Praise in the Midst of the Storm

"Please God! Please God! Please God!"

These words tried to overpower the force of the winds that were whipping my body this way and that. The excruciating sting of sand, dirt, hail, boards, glass, sheetrock, tree limbs, rain, 200+ mile an hour winds all beating against me and tossing me around as if I were a ragdoll. Words can hardly describe it....

It was a very pleasant day in January. January 21, 1999 to be exact. I had been in class all day at ASU-Beebe and decided to go over to my boyfriend's townhouse to cook supper for him and one of his roommates. Weatherwise, it was one of those "weird" days. Tornadoes had been popping up all across the state that afternoon. It felt more like spring outside than a dead-of-winter day. The temperatures had been in the 60s and 70s all day, and it had actually been sunny most of the day in Beebe.

My Mama had called earlier in the afternoon and told me to stay put at Jay's because they had already been spotting funnel clouds in Vilonia and she did not want me to drive home and possibly be caught in a storm. Also, Jay's Mama had called to check on us because the state had been having such a significant weather event with all of the tornadoes. Y'all know the kind of day I'm talking about. I love the sense of community that we all feel when our state is hit with "weather". Whether it is a big snow that's coming to rainy weather to yucky 100-degree summertime temps to tornadoes. We Arkansans seem to huddle together and "watch what's next".

Let me give you a bit of a side note to what was going on in my life up to this point. I was 20 years old. Jay had been my boyfriend for a few years and I sincerely loved him. I would have married him in a heartbeat. But a few months prior to January 21 the Holy Spirit began to really convict me about some things that I was doing in my life. He let me know very clearly that I was not living for Christ. So, I started trying to weed out all the junk that I had been doing and started doing what I was supposed to be doing rather than submitting to sin. On the afternoon of January 21, 1999 at 4:30 in the afternoon, I almost stumbled. I ALMOST submitted to that sin again. But I didn't. The reason I didn't was because Jay's roommate, Kirk, came home early. Whew, dodged that one. Or did I? For months I had been able to resist that particular sin, but in a moment I ALMOST messed up again. I would have committed that sin again ONLY if Kirk had not arrived early. God needed to get my attention. And He DID!....

I had just finished cleaning up the kitchen and sat down to study World Lit when yet another tornado warning popped up on KTHV. This time the warning was for our county. That got my attention, but what really got my attention was when I heard the sound of hail outside. Jay had been asleep on the couch while Kirk took a nap in the recliner. I woke Jay up and we went to stand in the front doorway to watch the hail. I had never in my life seen hail, and boy was it coming down! All I could think is that my Dad was going to kill me because i had just dropped my full-coverage insurance down to liability on my car. And my poor Mustang was taking a real beating from all the hail.

The hail was HUGE. It was nuts!

Since this was a row of townhouses, all of the vehicles were lined up right outside of the front doors of the homes. There was a motorcycle parked next to my car, and the owner had turned up the radio so that all the neighbors could hear the weather announcements clearly. Then the hail stopped.

The rain stopped.
The wind stopped.
It was DEAD quiet.
We knew something was wrong.

Jay and I ran inside and woke Kirk up from his nap. I remember looking down at his feet and noticing he only had socks on and no shoes.

We all ran to the half bath underneath the staircase. Jay locked the bathroom door behind us. I assume he thought that would somehow keep the massive monster that was about to overtake us on the outside. Kirk crouched down and wrapped his arms around the toilet. Then I tucked my arms underneath this legs and held on. Then Jay wrapped his arms around my waist and squeezed as tightly as he could. Suddenly the water started being sucked down the toilet and then it would fling back up. I'll never forget that sound.

Then my life changed.

I didn't hear a train. I didn't hear a loud roar. I heard the sound of a deep-voiced woman screaming as loudly as I have ever heard anything. That's what it sounded like to me. I have tried to recreate the sound with my own voice, but it is something that I cannot come close to recreating.

The entire townhouse then began to be scooted across the foundation. The actual walls were pushing us across the bathroom floor, then the kitchen floor, and then BOOM! The roof exploded. It sounded like a bomb went off! Then the pain started. All three of us were then separated. Kirk was separated from the toilet; I was separated from Kirk; and Jay's tight grip was not enough to hold on to me. So many thoughts went through my mind. No, my life didn't flash before my eyes. But I did know that I was in the middle of a tornado. I knew that I was feeling pain like I had never felt before. I knew that if I died then I would go straight to heaven. And I knew that if I didn't die then it was possible that I could be left with some major injuries. I imagined my nose being ripped off, or my back being broken so that I would never walk again. I also knew that God was getting my attention....

The wind whipped around me. The rain and hail beat me up. It was INCREDIBLY cold. It felt as though I was being sandblasted. I hurt from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet. I couldn't hear anything except the sound of this blackness screaming SO loudly. My body was being whipped opened and closed. My arms and legs were going to and fro. I was up in the air...

...and then I landed.

It had passed. I was on my knees with my hands and head buried in mud. My eyes were closed and I was still screaming, "Please God! Please God! Please God!" The tornado hit around 7:15 so it was dark outside other than the occasional lightning flash. Jay was able to locate me because of my loud cries to the Lord. He ran over and picked me up. We then heard Kirk yelling. That's when I opened my eyes.

Oh. My. Word.

Kirk couldn't see because his face was covered in blood. His head had multiple cuts that required a ton of stitches. Remember his shoeless feet? His feet had injuries too because he had not been wearing shoes. *Side note: I ALWAYS make sure my family and I have shoes on during stormy weather*

My body was warm all over. Strange, huh, since I had just been through one of the coldest things ever. But it was, it was very warm. We made our way to the townhouses across the road. I call the townhouse we went to call our parents the "safe house". It was full of people. The owner let me use his phone to call my Mama and Daddy. Mama answered the phone and I immediately said, "Mama, we were in a tornado!" She didn't believe me because I am a life-long practical joker. So, she thought I was trying to pull her leg once again. I said, "Put Daddy on the phone." I then told him that we really had been in a tornado and he needed to come get me because I had no idea where my car was. Where it once had been parked was now desolate. And the townhouse we had once been eating supper and watching the weather in was completely gone. Only water sprayed up from the pipes where the toilet had once been.

As we waited in the "safe house", the paramedics arrived and asked if anyone needed medical attention. We of course said Kirk did, and they took him away. Right about that time, Jay raised his arm over his head only to reveal an enormous gash across his elbow. The blood started flowing. I still kept thinking, "I'm so warm. Maybe nothing is wrong with me."

Finally, my Dad arrived and drove me back home to Vilonia. Mama was anxiously waiting at the front door. The worry was all over her face. I know I had to have looked like a complete mess. I could still taste the dirt and mud in my teeth. And when I actually made it into my room and looked in the mirror, YIKES! I was a complete mudball. From head to toe, I was covered COVERED in mud. My teeth were black with mud. My sister, Kelli, came in to help me undress and take a shower before heading to the hospital. I had began to get some feeling in my body back. The feeling of warmth was subsiding, and the feeling of extreme pain was taking over. There was still warmth flowing down the front of my right leg though, and I soon discovered what that feeling of warmth was. While my arms and legs had been whipped open and closed by the tornado, my right leg had actually been pulled away from my body. Blood was streaming down my leg. My sister ran in the living room to where my family was and yelled, "She has something sticking out of her." Well, I didn't have anything sticking out of me, but it hurt nonetheless.

After arriving at the hospital, I tried to lighten things up a little with some jokes to make everyone know that what had happened was no big deal. But on the inside, I was in turmoil. I KNEW that God had sent this tornado in my life as a wake-up call. I KNEW He had sent it in my life to lead me to FREEDOM.

Does that sound weird? A tornado means freedom? What in the world?

1999 was a crazy year for me. It started in January with a physical tornado that left me physically hurt but spiritually awakened. Over the next few months, I started to do things that I knew the Lord wanted me to do and also things that I THOUGHT He wanted me to do.

Have you ever done something that you didn't seek the Lord for but just thought, "This has to be what God wants me to do"? I started doing that. I knew I had been left on this earth for a reason a few months prior and had to begin the work God had for me. I almost had a haughty attitude about things. I didn't vocalize my pride, but it was definitely there.

I broke up with Jay. I met another guy. This guy nor his family knew the Lord. I thought, "I must be the one who is going to save this family." I married him December 4, 1999. This was absolutely out of the Lord's will. In my pride, I did not seek what the Lord wanted me to do in this situation. I just knew that I had been left here after going through a terrible ordeal called a tornado, so this MUST be what God wants me to do. It wasn't.

Obviously, I divorced him a year later after some other "tornadoes" that were put in my path. God always makes a way. He is always there with His arms opened wide. He always has a plan. I knew I wanted to be on God's plan and wanted to let Him fulfill His plan for my life.

I completely and totally surrendered to Him. The exact day I did that was the first time in my life that I could feel His arms wrapped around me. God is so good, huh? He has had my life planned since before I breathed my first breath on this earth. I am so thankful that I can now see so clearly God's plan for my life. I released all control. And He has led me to a wonderful place.

Sometimes God has to get our attention before we will surrender to Him. But when we do surrender, oh how precious the relationship with the Lord is!