When life gives you lemons, make a pot of sunshine!

This has been quite a day. My Mama went to the cardiologist yesterday for some tests but really expected it to be nothing. Well it turned out that she failed her stress test. While she was on the treadmill there at the doctor's office, the doctor noticed that the top part of her heart was not functioning. So she was scheduled for an arteriogram and stints to be placed on Tuesday (today). She was shocked and so were the rest of us! The procedure started at around 2:50 and was suppose to last about 30 minutes. It ended up taking about an hour. But guess what! No blockage, no abnormalities, just a "perfect" heart. That was the doctor's word for her heart, PERFECT. Now everyone was shocked again. How could everything yesterday be so out of whack in her little heart and today be perfect? I sat there for about an hour praying and thinking and wondering how this could be. And then a peace came over me. How could this be that her heart is now "perfect". I can totally answer that. God. I know that my Mama was covered in prayer. I know the doctor and staff were covered in prayer. I know that my Mama was in God's hands. He is the Great Physician. He healed my Mama's heart.

I know there are people who will say that maybe she just had a bad test the day before. Well, she had 2 tests a week ago and failed those too. God can do anything. God is still performing miracles. I see them every day. And I witnessed another great one today.

But let me tell you the greatest thing of all. My Mama had a perfect heart before the doctor told us what the arteriogram revealed. She is the kind of person who puts herself on the bottom of the list. She goes out of her way to make sure everyone is ok and taken care of. She will pray for you always. She loves the way God has told us to love. She is a hard worker so that she can give her money to those who need it. My Mama is amazing. I love her.



Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her. Proverbs 31:28

Life on the farm is kinda laid back

I must begin by saying that there is absolutely nothing like taking a trip out to the farm in Plumerville. We (Mama, Tinleigh, Eleighana, and I) go out there once a week to visit my Pappaw and Uncle Raymond aka Great Ray as the girls call him. We started this tradition of once-a-week visits when my Mammaw got sick with Alzheimers. I cherish these trips so much. I love being able to ride the short 20 minutes to Plumerville with my Mama. I love the conversations we have. If we do happen to miss a week from time to time, I am left with a bit of a void that week. I love the calm and peace that I have everytime I am on the farm. There is just something about farm life. It's natural. It's calm. It's peaceful. Everywhere you look it seems that God is shining. The sun shining on the pond-the cows grazing in the pasture-the smell of freshly cut hay-beautiful blue skies-mature trees-a random coyote creeping across the field-neighbors and family stopping by-big tree swings-walks down the dirt road-memories of my childhood-wildflower necklaces. My list could go on and on. I love this place.

There was a time in a my life a few years ago when I was going through a very difficult time. Can I just say it was pretty much horrible? I was dealing with some things that I never ever would have thought I would be going through. There are some things that I would never even want to tell anyone about. I was hurting. I was married to a man I should have never married. I truly thought that I was following God by marrying him. I thought I was "rescuing" and "saving" his family. He and his family had never attended church and they actually are agnostic. I thought I would swoop in and save the day. But needless to say, that was not God's plan. It was evident to me immediately that I should never have been married to him. But I was. What could I do but stay married and pray for the best. Quickly life turned completely upside down. I wanted to run away. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs that I was scared and hurting and wrong. But as time went on, I started to think maybe this was how life was suppose to be for me. I had made a terrible decision and married this man, so I had to live with it. I went to church every Sunday still. I prayed that God would change things. I begged Him. And then things got worse. I was in a position that I knew I could not be in any longer. So divorce papers were filed and I was on the road to freedom. Those months waiting for the papers to be final were long and hard. I was now left with all the bills and only one income. BUT I was free. I was drawing closer and closer to my Father who had been with me the whole time. I wanted to feel His arms wrapped around me. I wanted to feel the comfort that I longed for from God. About 3 months after I received notice in the mail from the courts that everything was over, I was asked to be a bridesmaid in a wedding of a very good friend. We arrived early that day on Petit Jean Mt. to open up one of the buildings there to prepare for the brunch that morning. I struggled to open this very old wooden window. I pushed and tugged and finally it opened. My words will never be able to describe what I saw and felt. God was right there in my face. Now, don't go thinking I'm a crazy gal. Of course I didn't see God standing there. I saw His beauty in the creation He had made. I felt His warmth. I felt His comfort. I felt His peace. I stood there worshipping Him in silence. I could so deeply feel the Holy Spirit saying, "It's all okay. You are truly free."

Well that is exactly how I feel everytime I go to the Trafford farm. I feel God's presence and am reminded that "It's all okay. And I am truly free." God has blessed me far beyond what I deserve. I deserve a firey hell. I could never be good enough to deserve Jesus and His grace. But because of what Jesus did for me on that cross, I am truly free and it's all okay.

I know my God made a way. And I know His word never fails. I know my God made a way for me. It's gonna be alright!

Good Golly Miss Molly!

I have wanted to have my very own blog for sooooo long now. And I finally have one! Hooray! I have so many random thoughts from day to day. Those who read this may find me to be a little Ca-razzy! :)

I just have to say that I'm feeling pretty stinkin' thankful today. The blessings abound everywhere I look. I have my dream job. I have two beautiful girls. I have a husband who loves God more than anything which in turn makes him love us that much more. I have friends who are true and will pray for anything that I ask of them. I have a family who trained me "up in the way I should go". I have a church family who is such a blessing to me and my family. I have a God who, despite all my sins, all my undesirables, all my wrongs, all my insufficiencies, all my "issues", still loves me above all else. God continues to daily show up and prove His love and grace and mercy and faithfulness to me. I am so undeserving yet He still is there.

I had a conversation with a Very Dear friend today about not letting our left hand know what our right hand is doing. Matthew 6:3. God has told us to love. He has told us to Love others above ourselves. He has told us to serve others with love from our hearts. He also has told us to do these things to bring glory to Him and because that should be in our hearts. Not for the vain pleasure of others seeing us. Our reward is not man's boasting about us. It is for God to see. For Him to see our hearts. For Him to receive the glory. For Him to know that we love Him so much that we would put our selfish needs aside and serve Him and others. He even instructs us to pray in our rooms and not to boast about our praying. I just think this is such a big deal to God. He wants everything we do to be about Him. I love that. He has made everything so easy and simple for us to worship, serve, follow, pray, and Love Him.

My God is so Big. So Strong. So Mighty. There is NOTHING my God cannot do!